Blast from the past

 

Is it an indication that a global Armageddon date has been set, to be preceded by monstrous, vile, contorted apparitions that scratch at the soul? Just when you thought it was safe to listen to your radio, New Kids on The Block have announced that they’re reforming.

Is. There. Any. Need.

No, in a word.

Reunions are almost always a bad idea. Bumping into the dullard that you sat next to in Geography while you’re doing the big shop at Tesco is grim enough, but having to live through the fresh hell of boy bands reforming causes me to retch violently into my own hands.

However, much as I’d rather chop off my own knees than admit it, NKOTB were staggeringly successful in their day. Brought together by singer and producer Maurice Starr, the boy band was born in Boston in 1984 and sold over 70 million records worldwide.

Can you still name all five members? Of course you can. Danny Wood, Jordan and Jonathan Knight, Joey McIntyre and Donnie Wahlberg. Members, everyone of them. Remember Hangin’ Tough? What about The Right Stuff (actually entitled You Got It (The Right Stuff))? And, and… actually I can’t name anymore. But they did release six albums before disbanding in 1994.

I can’t wait for them to disband again, unlike another band that, frankly, should never have split up in the first place. Fortunately The Who have also reunited an equal number of times since they first played together in 1964 and were recognised in 1990 as one of the greatest bands in the world. Mind you, how a band makes its money covering tv theme tunes from American forensic dramas is a mystery.

While I have nothing but derision and bile for NKOTB, there’ll always be a soft, squidgy place in heart for Gary, Jason, Howard and Mark. Take That truly are the comeback kings. Disbanding in 1996, reforming a decade later after an ITV documentary, their return was truly stellar. Their album Beautiful World has sold over 2.3 million copies so far since its release in November 2006, making it one of the top 20 albums of the 21st century.

No doubt 2008 will see more of them receive their tax bills and wonder how to best pay it with the least amount of effort. Unfortunately the rest of us will have to pay, too. Enough said.

What’s caught the ear of Texperts this week (April 11th)

 

Portishead- Machine Gun: When we found out there was a sneak of the new album available, this one caused quite a stir… It looks like it was all worth the wait.

The Breeders-We’re Going to Rise: Rumours that absolute zero is to be renamed “Kim Deal”, on account of her being the epitome of cool, are unconfirmed.

Cut Chemist feat. Hymnal- What’s the Altitude: Just listen. It’s great.

Neon Neon- I Lust U: Take one Welsh singer-songwriter, one Super Furry Animal and some cool electronic beats and you get this bad boy.

Blood Red Shoes- Its Getting Boring By the Sea: In anticipation of their upcoming debut album.

The Cribs- I’m A Realist: Apparently Johnny Marr is a full time Crib now. Can the man not be satisfied with just one great band?

Squarepusher- Come on My Selector: Squarepusher + Chris Cunningham= Very, very weird.

INXS- Need You Tonight/Mediate: A bit of a classic

Rage Against the Machine- Testify: RATM return to UK shores this summer with a couple of shows at the festivals. Fingers crossed for a new album as well…

Roxy Music- Ladytron: And why not.

Idlewild- A Modern Way of Letting Go: Famously described as the sound of “a flight of stairs falling down a flight of stairs”.

Sniping, Back-Biting and In-Fighting

 

When Robert Zemeckis was on pre-production of his motion-captured, computer animated film Beowulf, he thought long and hard about which actors could provide the right kind of otherworldly performance that was necessary for Grendel, the legendary monster of the tale. He eventually came to the conclusion that there was only one actor in the world who could do it, and that actor’s name is Crispin Glover. It must have been a hard decision to come to, and an even harder phone call to make, because nearly twenty years ago, Glover sued him!

Crispin Glover appeared in Zemeckis’s 1985 sci-fi adventure Back to the Future as George McFly, the father of the lead character, Marty. When it came to start work on the two sequels, the producers claim that Glover made various demands that were far in excess of his standing as an actor at the time, so they chose not to use him in the next two films. Instead, they came up with a plot that contrived to work around this problem.

Back to the Future Part II has four distinct sections:

The Present (1985): Actress Claudia Wells who played Marty’s girlfriend, Jennifer, in the first film was not available and so she was re-cast with Elisabeth Shue. This necessitated filming a recreation of the end of the first film which features actor Jeffrey Weissman, as George McFly. He wears sunglasses and is generally filmed creatively;

The Future (2015): in which George McFly is in his late seventies and played by Weissman in heavy make-up;

Alternate Timeline 1985: in which George is dead, and finally;

1955: In which Weissman is seen in a few distance shots, and - as it replays events from the original film - archive footage of Crispin Glover from Back to the Future was worked in.

Guess which bit caused the problem!

Glover brought a lawsuit against the production, including Zemeckis and Steven Spielberg as he had not given permission for his image to be used, was not paid and was concerned that the “trick” might make people think he was in the film. As a result of the lawsuit, Glover got a credit at the end of Part II for the archive footage and, positively, the Screen Actors’ Guild altered their guidelines to make sure footage could no longer be used in this way without obtaining permission.

In an interview with The Guardian, Glover said that before he went in to meet with Zemeckis to discuss Beowulf, he had read the book How to Be a Gentleman, and took one of its bits of advice - “don’t bring up sore subjects” - to heart, thanked Zemeckis for thinking of him, and accepted the role.

McFly

That’s nice and neat, then, but a nice wrap up like that is rare in the film world. If you’re a fiend for muck-raking gossip magazines, then you’ll love the work of Kenneth Wilbur Anglemyer. As Kenneth Anger, he is the man responsible for the two Hollywood Babylon books, detailing the scandals of the golden age. They contain much that is inaccurate, or downright untrue, but for lurid detail they are unsurpassed - truth be damned!

For old school movie trash talk, you certainly can’t beat the titanic bitching missiles that Bette Davis and Joan Crawford aimed at each other. This relationship is often called a “feud”, a term refuted by Davis in her book “This ‘N That” - presumably meaning they had no real face-to-face bust up. However, they were clearly rivals - and comments they made about each other in interviews bears this out, with Davis claiming that Crawford had “slept with every male star at MGM except Lassie” (yes, I know - but they’ve always used male dogs to play the role), and Crawford offering up “poor Bette, It appears she’s never had a happy day, or night, in her life”. Davis may take the pennant though by giving the world the incredibly ferocious barb which is “you should never say bad things about the dead, you should only say good . . . Joan Crawford is dead. Good.”

Okay, so we’re well out of the golden age and the exclusive studio system that created such rivalries no longer exists in that form, so predictably you don’t get such epic tales as this, but what we DO have is new technology, and the Internet and - increasingly - DVD commentaries are proving to be ripe picking grounds for some prime dirt.

On the forum of director Kevin Smith’s website, viewaskew.com, the man himself responded to a forum post about Paul Thomas Anderson’s film “Magnolia” saying he didn’t really like it much. In fact he said that he would keep his screener copy on his desk as “a constant reminder that a bloated sense of self-importance is the most unattractive quality in a person or their work”. Web forums and fandom being what they are, it all blew up into a whirlwind and as a result of what Smith calls a “slow news day” his comments apparently made it into the New York Post and Entertainment Weekly. On his fantastically entertaining (and somewhat dirt dishing) DVD, An Evening with Kevin Smith, he recalls meeting Paul Thomas Anderson at a later date and being somewhat humbled at how polite this man who he “bitchslapped on the internet” was to him (and suggested that his response in the inverse situation would have involved a chair to the head).

smith.jpg

On DVD commentaries, people are generally on their best behaviour, but there are a few offenders. Paul Verhoeven can be a little indiscreet, but for the complete unprofessional back-talking package, you really need to do two very difficult things. One of them is watch an entire film directed by Uwe Boll while he comments on it, and the other is to import the rare Japanese DVD of Vincent Gallo’s controversial film The Brown Bunny - the only edition to feature a commentary (parts of which are audible in this episode of The Hollywood Saloon podcast.).

Uwe Boll is noted for making films based on video games, something for which he appears to be almost universally criticised, and yet still seems to able to secure funding to make more. His commentary for Alone in the Dark savages actress Tara Reid, particularly her refusal to bare her breasts during a sex scene (suggesting she wears less when going clubbing than she does in that scene - and, erm, to various parties) and as such he starts it by apologising to the audience for not being able to edit her out of the film entirely.

Vincent Gallo’s film, The Brown Bunny, is the one that became notorious for its final scene in which Chloe Sevigny performs fellatio on him (I’m not going to link to that!). For a while it was rumoured that a prosthetic stand-in for Gallo (well, part of him anyway) had been used in the scene - however, Sevigny (Gallo’s former girlfriend) later explained that the scene had, in fact, been done for real. In his commentary for the film, he has some choice words to say about both Kirsten Dunst and Winona Ryder, calling them “jerks”. Both were dropped from the project before even making it to the set (internet speculation tends to err towards the seemingly obvious conclusion of that particular scene being the contentious issue involved).

Hollywood dirt is always amusing for the normals, and yet it’s not all about bitching or people complaining that things don’t go their way. Sometimes, in the case of the Back to the Future Part II issue, it can actually lead to a positive outcome, and even a reduction in hard feelings if everyone’s prepared to just be reasonable.

So thank God that they aren’t!

Sarah Speaking at the Great Eastern Investment Forum

 

Texperts CEO Sarah McVittie is the featured speaker at the Great Eastern Investment Forum Breakfast Briefing, which will be held at the The Trinity Centre in the Cambridge Science Park on Wednesday 14th May 2008.

The Great Eastern Investment Forum (GEIF) is a leading UK business angel network located in Cambridge which exists to introduce ambitious, innovative companies seeking funding to business angels and other early-stage funders seeking quality investment opportunities. Sarah will be discussing  her experience in the Cambridge  high-tech sector and how she secured backing for Texperts as a start-up.

Knowledge is (Horse)power

 

In his first blog for us, Dominic F recounts how he and his fellow Texperts experienced the Grand National weekend…

Saturday April 5th 2008 saw the 165th running of the Grand National, arguably the most famous horse race in the world. Working the few days before the race and the afternoon building up to it, I saw quite a few requests for tips in the queue and, where I could, I dealt with them myself and provided the nag-knowledge-needy public with my own tips (properly sourced of course!) – large priced value bet Black Apalachi (best price 66/1) and the eventual winner Comply Or Die (best price 12/1). I hope that Texperts made some punters a few quid!

Bragging aside, the real reason for this blog entry is an excuse to talk facts, statistics and trivia. Knowledge is power. We should have ALL worked out that Comply Or Die would win the race, because of recent trends:

The last time a horse won with odds longer than 33/1 was in 1995 (Royal Athlete, 40/1) and it has only happened three times in the last 40 years. So we’d have been fairly safe eliminating all horses priced at greater than 33/1 on the morning of the race, leaving us with half the field, right off the bat.

The most significant factor in picking a winner is weight. In the last half century, only the great Red Rum has won carrying more than 11st 5lbs. In the last 25 years, only Hedgehunter has been victorious carrying more than 11st and that was only 11st 1lb. Experts absolutely insist that the ideal weight range for a National winner is 10st – 11st. We could have further narrowed the field to 10 potential winners then, by ruling out Butler’s Cabin, Simon, Turko, L’Ami, Vodka Bleu, Mr Pointment, Hedgehunter, Chelsea Harbour, Slim Pickings and Snowy Morning.

Every winner of the race since Gay Trip in 1970 has previously won over three miles or further, so we could also have discounted King John’s Castle, leaving us with nine.

Age is an important statistic in choosing a winner, no seven year old has won the race since 1940 and only three eight year olds have won the race in the last three decades. In addition, only two teenagers have ever won the race and only ten 12 year olds have succeeded. We could have happily ruled out Philson Run, Mon Mome and Cloudy Lane with this information, reducing the field to six.

Contrary to popular belief, the race has not been such a punting lottery in recent years – 13 of the last 17 winners were in amongst the eight shortest priced nags in the market. Using this statistic, we could have slashed the field to just Comply Or Die and Bewleys Berry.

For those that like to pick horses simply on the colour of the jockey’s silks, green is the way forward - half of the winning jockeys in the ten years leading up to the 2008 race have been wearing green. That ruled out the cream and black colours of Dennis O’Regan on board Bewleys Berry, leaving us with the obvious victor – Comply Or Die. Seemingly, quite a few punters had come to the same conclusion as the night before the race, you could get 12/1 about Timmy Murphy piloting the winner but a huge market move saw his mount backed into 7/1 joint favouritism.

So for the 2009 Grand National, keep these facts in mind, and remember - knowledge is (horse) power!